More reasons to love Manhattan...

On the way into work today, I got free band-aids as part of a promotion for some anti-burn cream.

Oh, and I saw the following celebrity on the way home:


(Hint: It's Shaquille O'Neal)

For those of you with significant others, how do you deal with them farting in bed?

I've been playing phone-tag with a headhunter who found my resume' online and wants me to interview for a certain media conglomerate that rhymes with "BoozeWarp". My experiences with headhunters has oscillated between good and abysmal. When we have the same goals, they're good. Most of the time, they suck. They're trying to push you in career directions you don't want to go. Simply trying to set up a phone interview with this one has become a hassle because I'm not available during the day to talk because, duh, I work.

On the other hand, Doctor Girlfriend hasn't heard from a single headhunter so I can only feel lucky that the skills I'm trying to abandon are still in such demand.

That PepsiStuff promotion looked great on paper. I finally had enough points to get the Simpsons Movie on DVD, and suddenly they're out of the Simpsons Movie on DVD. In fact, they're out of most movies on DVD. I ended up ordering Mork and Mindy Season 1 because it's the only option I could tolerate owning.

"Subject to availability" is a total bitch. It's like bait-and-switch.

I saw the movie "Enchanted" this weekend starring Amy Adams. I thought Disney had a good opportunity to say something deep and meaningful with this movie about comparing the attitudes of animated princesses to real life, but they wussed out. I felt a similar opportunity was wasted on "My Super Ex-Girlfriend". All in all, it was a typical Disney girl flick.

I also saw "Cloverfield", and would have been more amused if the two movies were combined. I know a few princesses who desperately need to be eaten by a giant bug.

Speaking of Amy Adams, last week she was filming a movie with Meryl Streep at the Hoboken train terminal called Julie and Julia. I managed to see her and invited her back to my place for a threesome. Sweet.

It's only Sunday, and already I've seen "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" twice.

The second time was an accident. Doctor Girlfriend and myself visited my parents today who offered to treat us to the movie. How could I say no to Mom?

Some thoughts (heavy spoilers follow. You have been warned):

--I liked the little homages to the first movie, including the sight of the Art of the Covenant in the Area 51 warehouse.
--I liked how the entire shift of the movie went from the adventure series of the 30's (as originally intended) to the sci-fi B-movies of the 50's (appropriate since the latest chapter takes place in 1957). Lots of space-alien babble ("they're from not just another planet, but another dimension), atomic tests and fear of communists (you'd think Indy would have read the Communist Manifesto).
--Indy's son is named Mutt. Appropriate, considering they named the dog Indiana.
--I liked the nod to Denholm Elliott (who played Marcus Brody in the first and third Indiana Jones films and died in 1992). Once I learned Sean Connery refused to be in this movie, I figured they'd kill off his character as well.
--My guess is that John Hurt played the character they actually wanted to be Henry Jones Sr (actually, upon reading the IMDB file on this film, this has been discovered to be untrue). It's a shame because I liked the banter between Indy and his father in "Last Crusade" and think it would have highlighted the generational theme more.
--Karen Allen rocks. I liked how they explained how Indy could sleep with the forgettable Nazi chick in "Last Crusade" without cheating on Marion (because he left her before the wedding). Since "Temple of Doom" is a prequel to Raiders, it was okay that he slept with Kate Capshaw in that flick.
--What, no Sallah?
--Shia LeBeouf as Henry Jones III? We'll see how well that works.
--I liked when Indy mentioned Pancho Villa to Mutt, thus cementing the continuity of the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles (that episode was the pilot). This movie actually made me want to buy the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles on DVD.

This past weekend was my college 15 year reunion. Next year is my high school 20 year reunion. I don't plan to go to that either.

I was actually asked if I was going by one of the few high school friends I keep in touch with (married, with a kid. Earning more money than me as a cop despite my M.B.A.). When I said "no", he tried to convince me to go. We ended the conversation with me saying "I'll consider it" (Bob-Speak for a delaying tactic while I think of a good reason not to go).

I decided to do a Google search on a couple of names from high school. I found two. The former class president lives in Princeton Junction, but there was no available information on him otherwise (he has a MySpace account but I refuse to join just to cyberstalk). The other went to UPenn, got married, had kids, and is some sort of publications director for a Philly University (he was always an excellent writer and smart as a whip). The two are close friends and I found one through the other.

In short, everyone else is progressing in life and I'm standing still.

That is all. Have a nice Memorial Day Weekend.

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After reading through yesterday's comments, I have decided that the best pseudonym for the newborn will be "Zenephew". This was Wes' idea. Thanks, Wes. The check is in the mail.

I finished another e-book. This one was "The Almost Moon" by Alice Sebold. It was about a woman who wore her jeans so low-cut half her ass was showing (hence, the almost moon). Okay, that's not what it was about. It was about a 49 year old woman who kills her mentally ill mother. Hilarity ensues. Sebold is an excellent writer with a gift for fantastic prose, but I didn't like the ending of the book. "The Lovely Bones" was better.

Okay, maybe I did one or two other things. I won the lottery, for one. Three whole bucks. Pity I lost twenty that day on a parking ticket. Damn Hoboken cops.

I also went out on a double date with Joel. It involved a belly dancer. Enough said.

The first one is Deniece. The second one is Denephew. Doctor Girlfriend and I have been debating what to call the third one (who is male, by the way) on this blog.

Munchkin?
Predator?
DeBaby? (Won't be a baby forever, so not sure about this one)
Pursuit? (It's a synonym of his first name)
DeStroyer?
Morbo?
Ultimate Fighter?
DeYoungest?
Supremie? (He was a premie)
Awesome-O?

Any ones you like? Any suggestions?

Not much happened this weekend.

Well, I did become an uncle again. But that's it.

Places I may or may not have ever stuck my penis:

--A jet turbine engine
--A container of jell-o
--A hot dog bun
--A container of hydrochloric acid
--A vacuum cleaner
--An electric socket
--An elephant's anus
--A toaster
--My computer's USB port
--My pants
--A woman's vag

There's fear and darkness all around you
The criminals are on the run
No use in hiding in the dark
I'll hunt you down 'cause I'm the Dog

I'm the Dog
The big bad Dog
The Bounty Hunter


What, you expect all my posts to make sense?

Ro is looking for a job. If anybody knows of any opportunities, please let one of us know. Preferably her.

I'm not sure, but I think blogging will be light for the next day or two as I'm working as a technical maitre d at my job (it's outside of my job description, but it shows that I'm flexible).

Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers. And to all the motherf**kers too.

This weekend, I finally caught the movie "Iron Man". Nothing pleasures a fanboy's heart like a comic book movie done faithfully and well. Robert Downey Jr. played the drunken playboy to a tee (was he using method acting? One must wonder). Jeff "The Dude" Bridges played the back-stabbing Obadiah Stane extremely well and Gwyneth Paltrow was fun to watch as Pepper Potts.

Minutae:
SPOILER ALERT
--If you stay for a minute into the end credits, you'll see the comics character of Nick Fury as played by Samuel L. Jackson. Originally, Fury was white but when Marvel Comics redid the character for their Ultimate universe a few years back, they made him black and based his looks on Samuel L. Jackson. In effect, Jackson is playing a character they made with him in mind. They're also setting up for the inevitable Thor, Captain America, and Avengers movies.
--This is the first movie Marvel Entertainment is financing on its own, so my guess is (based on the box office take) we'll see many more comics movies from them that are faithful to the original comics and likely better in quality as a result. They're obviously already planning to franchise.
--"Pepper" is a nickname for Virginia Potts in the comics, but in the movie they make it seem like Pepper is her first name.
--In the comics, Jarvis is Tony Stark's butler. In the movie, he's a computer system.
--The terrorist organization "Ten Rings" is a reference to Iron Man's nemesis The Mandarin (who may or may not have appeared in this movie. I'm not sure).
--It's funny how Tony Stark mistakes comics god Stan Lee for Hugh Hefner.
--Director Jon Feavreau (who appeared in another Marvel Comics movie, Daredevil) appears as one of Stark's bodyguards, Happy Hogan (who is also a character in the Iron Man comics).
--Someone else noted that the Stark Industries logo is a combination of Lockheed Martin and Northrop Grumman, two famous U.S. defense contractors.

To clarify yesterday's post, I think I can write well. I can form coherent sentences and generally use correct grammar. Deep thought, however, is beyond my ken. I'm more worried about finding a job that suits me than Objectivism or Laissez-Faire Capitalism.

By the way, I disagree with Rand's philosophy. It deals with the faulty assumption that everyone gets what they deserve based on work. Not true. There are those who become rich through inheritance. There are those who lose everything because of false information. Libertarianism looks good on paper, like communism. In practice, those in power tend to want to stay in power or acquire more power (which is simply an extension of people's survival instincts) and will cheat others to do so.

Writing is easy. Writing well is hard.

One of the reasons my posts are so short is that it’s about as long as my attention span can hold. I think this relates to my job problems as well. It might be A.D.D. If it is, I might be stuck with it since I refuse to take drugs to solve mental problems short of suicidal or homicidal tendencies (no, I'm not a Scientologist).

I perform better at multiple, smaller self-contained tasks than larger ones (which is probably why my psyche breaks down a big problem into smaller, more manageable units). This is not good for management-level thinking.

I see posts from fellow bloggers like Dave and Todd (links are on the right) and think “Damn, I wish I could write with such depth.” I probably could, but it would take me a while. I’d end up doing one blog post per decade.

I’ve never felt particular smart. Even social etiquettes that others deem as common sense escape me. I’ve often wished I was smarter than I actually was. I did well in school, but that’s only because I knew how to take a test. Despite common knowledge, reading in itself doesn’t increase one’s intelligence. It’s how the act is used afterwards more than the act itself.

I read the heavy thinking of these bloggers and think it’s a concerto symphony. Mine is more of a solo jam session. Warts and all.

R.I.P.

I hope everyone had a nice Cinco De Mayo.

Tomorrow night is the final Tuesday Night Trivia at the Baggot Inn. It is an emotional experience for me as that place is tied for responsibility with this blog for changing my life for the better by an incalculable amount. With the closing of the Baggot Inn, I feel as if an era of my life is ending.

There will be other Trivia nights at other locations, of course. Some Fool may even host occasionally. But the Baggot Inn will always hold a special place in my heart.

I can’t believe Trivia has been happening for over five years. Life moves faster as you can older. Anybody who’s older can tell you this. You get caught up in routines and duties and get set in your ways. Suddenly years have passed as quickly as a song.

I will be there on the final night. Hopefully some other familiar faces will be there as well.

(I have several favorite Trivia memories. One is having a woman at a bar pick me up for the first time ever. Another is winning three prizes the night where I got not a single answer correct. Do you have any? If so, what are they?)

I saw Disney's The Little Mermaid on Broadway and I must say I was a little disappointed. They added little bits to the play that weren't in the movie that I feel didn't really add anything. For example, when Ariel and her family had to escape the Sea Nazis by pretending to participate in that big concert, it seemed derivative of some other show. The same for when Ariel and her Aunt Ursula were both rejected by the rest of their family and had to live in a dilapidated underwater mansion called Aquamarine Aquariums.

Deniece, however, loved the show. I think she's more the target audience.

Bad things are happening to my weight. 208 lbs yesterday. It doesn't help that I have food in the house. I need to get to the gym more.