Reviews with major spoilers follow.

Still here? You were warned.

"The Aristocrats": I liked it. Bob Saget is a perverted man. Tim Conway appears at the end. They also give the warning at the end that no animals were actually fucked in the making of the film.

"Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince": I'll bet money that Snape is a double-agent and the whole Dumbledore death thing was faked. However, if it was true, it changes the whole dynamic of the series and makes me anticipate the next book. Like the other books of the series, I didn't think it was good nor did I think it was bad. It just was.

Finally, I have a situation. My mother has given me the name and e-mail of the daughter of someone she met at a social club. This daughter lives in Manhattan, so Mom, knowing very little about the mother and practically nothing about the daughter, decides to give me the contact info. This is not the first time my mother has done something like this. One instance I keep in mind is the time she gave me the name of a woman who already had a boyfriend and didn't tell her own mother about it. So, when I tried IMing her screen name on AOL, I was, in fact, IMing with her boyfriend. I ask you: in the same circumstances, would you contact her? If so, what would you say in the initial e-mail?

UPDATE: If anybody wants to join me, I'm going to see "The Aristocrats" in Union Square at 9 P.M.

I managed to beat the LavaLeader tonight in bowling. Well, I didn't, but with the help of a certain young wizard, we collectively beat him by adding together our scores.

That being said, I must mention that I'm unimpressed with the Leisure Time Bowl. It takes a long time for a substandard food delivery and the place looks dingy. I liked Bowlmor Lanes better. In fact, anybody who likes Leisure Time is obviously insane. On the plus side, the young wizard won some free bowling using his magical skills. I still want to try the bowling alley on Chelsea Piers.

It's a night in. Surprisingly, I've decided to stay sober.

UPDATE: I have learned that an evil subterranean race (the Lavamen) has threatened to conquer the surface of the Earth. I managed to diffuse the situation by challanging the leader to a bowling match this evening at the Leisure Time Bowling Alley in the Port Authority Bus Terminal at 6 P.M. If you like to bowl (you don't even have to be good), please join me in saving the world. Either that or get used to wearing your slave collars by Monday.

Posted in the afternoon, because I don't know if I'm going to have time to post tonight.

Anthony Stewart Head, who played Rupert Giles in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" is slated to guest-star on an episode of "Doctor Who" next season. I'm hoping they cast him as the Master.

A review of the Family Guy direct-to-DVD movie that is being released can be found here.

Tonight, I am going with a friend to the Jewish Museum to see the etchings of Maurice Sendak.

My Saturday night is currently unoccupied. Horrors!

Tomorrow evening, I may be going bowling. Stay tuned for details.

My first dates tend to last about an hour (unless there is no chemistry whatsoever and conversation is a bitch). Is that standard for everybody?

So how's your ass?

A quick dating-related story: I subscribed to the Nerve.com personals (most for storytelling purposes), and have thus far sent out 8 or 9 e-mails, none of which have been responded to. Women complain about receiving free "winks" on the service, but I can understand why men send them. Why spend the dollar if nobody responds? Anyways, a woman initiated an e-mail with me and I decided to respond back. After a week's wait, she wrote again stating that I seemed nice but she started seeing someone else. Hey, I didn't say it was a good story.

I was going to write something about the events of this past weekend, but I forgot what I was going to write. Say-la-vee. I tried going to an open mic today (I haven't done one in ages), but the one I was planning to go to doesn't exist anymore, so I just went home.

Recently, I went on a Jonathan Safran Foer kick and read both his books. Well, I tried to read his first one, "Everything Is Illuminated", but it wasn't terribly accessible and part of the story is a first-person narrative from a Russian who doesn't speak English very well. Foer writes in broken English for this character, and I've always hated reading broken English because it doesn't flow for me when I read it (one of my favorite authors Alan Moore tries a similar trick in his novel "Voice of the Fire"). I stopped reading "Everything Is Illuminated" at about page 100 and cannot honestly recommend it.

However, I found Foer's second novel "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" to be enjoyable. Like his first novel, it is told from a first-person perspective of a few people. His most interesting protagonist is a 9-year-old genius named Oskar Schell who lost his father in the Twin Towers on 9/11. In the novel, he shows the difference between genius and wisdom very well, displaying the gaps in Oskar's knowledge. The story is part mystery and part human drama, which Foer manages to make complement each other. I do recommend this book.

Foer's writing style is very stream-of-consciousness. When he writes conversations, he usually condenses it into a paragraph (rather than have line breaks between each spoken character) so the words seem to rattle out faster making the imagined conversation more clipped. He also uses graphical word-tricks and images to further the stream-of-conscious atmosphere that his books try to project. In that, his novels are very much like comic books, and it wouldn't surprise me to learn that he read comics as a kid (or possibly even now).

Foer's style, to me, is reminiscent to me of Alan Moore or Neil Gaiman (or even the Vertigo brand of DC Comics), and I've always enjoyed reading Alan Moore and Neil Gaiman. I will probably try to read his third book, when it is released. No, I won't buy it. That's why libraries were invented.

One last thing, July 26th is the 1-year anniversary of my move-in to the condo. Rejoice!

Friday:

I called in sick to work. I was planning to take a half-day, but my Thursday Night Insomnia combined with the intended road trip of Friday afternoon made that an impossibility. I feel asleep around 8 AM and slept through noon. That afternoon, I picked up Caren and Sarah for a trip to Six Flags Great Adventure to see Aaron Carter and some other performers in concert (both of them have blogged of the trip already). I'm not an Aaron Carter fan (nor really a fan of any particular musician), but I wanted to go simply to record the phenomenon of two 20/30-something year-old women going bonkers over a performer whose demographic, while being female, leans towards an average age of 12.

We got to the park at exactly 4 P.M. For those who are unaware, you can get coupons at Dunkin Donuts for buy-one-get-one-free admission to the park after 4 P.M. I purchased a stuffed doll of Gossamer (everyone should have one). Went went on a few rides and someone broke the swing ride that wasn't me (it might have been Sarah). After which, we went to the concert. I took several photos of Sarah and Caren acting like giddy schoolgirls next to actual giddy schoolgirls, none of which will be posted here.

Saturday:

I slept in and read a little until mid-afternoon (I finished my Jonathan Safran Foer book, for which I will post a review later). Then, Pam arrived and we went together to the Awesome 80's Prom. I won free tickets for this show last week and definitely wanted to go with Pam because she's the only one of my current friends whom I could have potentially taken to my actual prom in 1989 (which is also the year of the fictional prom of the show). So I did. If asked whom I went to the prom with, I will say "Pam".

I had a terrific time at the event. I noticed that there were several bachelorette parties at the event, as well as several women whom I doubt were born in 1989, much less attended a prom. I got my prerequisite prom picture and many photos were taken by Pam and I of each other at the show with the character cliche's of the cast, none of which will be posted here.

Sunday:

I volunteered at a soup kitchen. I was given the assignment of "monitor". This meant I was to wander amongst the seated homeless people while they ate their meals and took care of any problems that they had. Also, I had to keep them in line if they got rowdy (and homeless people are a surly bunch). One homeless person began being verbally abusive to the person sitting across, and I calmly asked the person to not insult the other people and let them eat. Then the old woman I told this to gave me a backhand to the face. Not being one to take such an insult lightly, I knocked her down with my elbow. At which point, she did a leg sweep and knocked me on my ass. She flipped upward and put me in a figure-four leg lock. I said "you're going down, bitch" and reversed the leg-lock. The hold was broken and we went to our corners. The old homeless woman then cheated and plowed into my back as I walked. We locked up and I twisted it into a sleeper hold. She elbowed me in the face and gave me a roundhouse kick which knocked me down so she could apply the STF (and that is one painful move). That hold was broken and she threw me against the ropes and took me down with a clothesline. I decided to stop being a nice guy. I went for the steel chair and she did the same. At which point, the ref called the match on a double DQ. Some photos were taken of the match, none of which will be posted here.

Okay, that didn't happen. What did happen was that after my volunteer work I met up with Sarah, Val, and Wes for dinner after they rode the Beast. That was nice.

Tonight it's blogging and laundry.

Have a good work week, everybody.

Last night, on a gorgeous night, I watched "Million Dollar Baby" against a movie screen with the skyline of New York City in the background...alone.

Tonight, on a hot evening, I went and saw the Upright Citizens Brigade perform improv at the beautiful Central Park Summerstage...alone.

This is a very disturbing pattern.

UPDATE: 2:22 A.M. Yay, insomnia! Imsomnia rocks! (Intended with a sarcastic tone)

UCB Review
I did enjoy the show. Names I recognized in the troupe were Amy Poehler, Rachel Dratch, Horatio Sanz, and Rob Riggle (I believe the name is Riggle) from SNL. I think Amy Poehler was the best of all of them. Rachel Dratch reminds me of Pam (or perhaps Pam reminds me of Rachel Dratch), and to quote Martha Stewart, that's a good thing. I found Horatio Sanz' performance to be kind of disappointing, as I heard good things about his improv ability and he really didn't do that much. Also in the cast was the famous "Inconsiderate Cell Phone Man" from the commercials you see before every movie in the theater to turn off your cell phone (the actor's name escapes me). The sketches had their peaks and valleys in terms of humor, but the show was overall good. Ultimately, I found the four founding members to be the best performers. I'm strongly considering taking an improv class there this fall.

Ricky Gervais, creator of the Office, has just released his new Britcom called EXTRAS in England. Information about it can be read here.

As of Friday, my novel hits 25,000 words. I'll probably never publish it, but much rejoicing anyway.

Reasons why today has sucked:

1. With regards to the drips from my water heater, it turns out that it's coming from the condo above mine (this was agreed upon by the PSE&G repairman who eventually came, the rep from my building's management company, and the person who lives in the condo below mine and also has leaks coming through). I slid a note under the condo door to contact me about this. Now I'm playing the waiting game and hoping that the dripping subsides. It was a waste of a sick day from work.

2. I had an appointment with the handyman to put up my shelves this evening. He never showed up. Anybody know of a good handyman in the Hoboken area?

3. I had a take-home test I had to redo (don't ask me any further details). I could have done it today, but it's always difficult to motivate myself to do programming at home. I'll do it during work tomorrow.

4. James Doohan died. He was finally beamed up.

5. Nobody is going with me to see UCB tomorrow night. *Sniff sniff*

On the plus side:
1. I got to take an afternoon nap (afternoon naps kick ass).
2. I was able to buy some light bulbs I needed.
3. In a fit of self-pity, I got some Domino's Pizza for lunch (they deliver!).

So the day didn't completely suck. Just mostly.

UPDATE: Among my other worries, I just came home before midnight to a profusely dripping hot water heater. The water is actually going through the floor to the condo below. I just called PSE&G and they're sending someone this morning to look at it. At the moment, my fortune utterly sucks.

If anybody at work reads this post, I'm in deep doo-doo.

I'm a lazy worker. I'm a computer programmer, and while I like my job, it doesn't enthuse me and I don't go out of my way to keep up with the latest technology or programming. I don't read independently and continually taking classes to keep up is cost and time prohibitive. I learn by researching when I encounter a new problem. Unlike many other careers, whatever I work in has a limited lifespan, and while I can learn new programming languages, employers are only interested in what you know.

I keep thinking about possible alternative careers, and I just can't think of one. I recall the last time I was unemployed, it took me a year to find another job (fortunately, I was employed for nine months of that year). I could pursue a career that interests me, but A) I don't know what that career is, and B) It would take a tremendous investment (both time and money) to learn a new trade. I really like my condo and don't want to lose it.

In college, I decided to major in Math because I did very well on my Math S.A.T.s (and poorly on my verbal). I tried actuarial science as a career and that ended poorly. I fell into a computer training course in the mid-90's, when the tech boom hit, and stayed in the career. I've hopped job to job with no upward mobility because I'm unwilling (and quite possibly unable) to make the commitment involved for a leap into management.

I don't have a solution. This personal issue is second only to my dating problems.

As a reminder, UCB in Central Park is this Thursday. Also, I may be working the soup kitchen again on Sunday.

From TV:
(Peter Griffin dresses as Zan from the Wonder Twins and touches Jayna's hand)
Peter and Jayna: Wonder Twin Powers, Activate.
Jayna: Form of an eagle. (Jayna flies away)
Peter: Shape of...Jayna's tampon. (Peter turns into a tampon and hops into Jayna's purse)
Peter: Now we play the waiting game.

From a movie in the 70's:
"I don't believe this shit. When we don't want him, he's around. When we want him, he's not around. I'm going to go get a beer."
"Da-da-DAH!"

I thought of a new relationship concept today. I call it the "soft flirt".

It came to me when I was considering the difference between "hard sell" and "soft sell" in sales. In hard selling, you get in the client's face and keep pushing your product until he gives in or throws you out. With the soft sell, you quietly discuss the product and hope to convince using logic and reason.

With the soft flirt, it's a little different. When people flirt obviously, they touch or pay attention or laugh at jokes. With the soft flirt, it's a matter of subtlety. They don't quite not pay attention. They send mixed messages as if leaving the door open for future obvious flirting.

The trick is that usually the flirters are not aware that they are flirting. In their mind, they're just being friendly. The recipient of the soft flirt doesn't quite know what to do, because the signals are mixed. When I receive the soft flirt, I usually leave it alone, because I feel it's better to err on the side of caution. However, and I've been considering, perhaps I should pursue, or at least question the soft flirt. At this stage, what do I have to lose?

On a somewhat-related note, JDate is asking a very annoying question in a poll of men on their main site when you log in. It asks if a man is unmarried and with no serious relationships at a particular age if they have issues. Thanks, JDate. You pricks.

The weekend in review:

On Friday night, I went down to central NJ to see a friend in the show "Annie". My friend was great, but there are certain shows that I simply loathe watching mostly due to being sick to death of them. "Annie" is one of them. I found myself leaving the theater for a walk whenever my friend wasn't in a scene.

On Saturday during the day, I was supposed to finally have a handyman come and put up my shelves, but he couldn't make it and we had to reschedule for Wednesday. As a result, I spent the day watching Season 2 and the Christmas Special of the British version of "The Office".

Saturday night has already been written about by Phil and Tamara (Chris was there as well). As mentioned on the other blogs, the film festival had some good movies and bad movies (and at the top of the list of good movies was Tamara's). The bad movies were utterly laughable. One had such things as shots of 50's porn story magazines morphing into each other. Another had what must have been the worst fight scene involving katanas on a beach in any movie, ever. It was a thrill to watch a movie sitting next to the director of it (it was like having a personal director's commentary track) and I even noticed Allie's name in the closing credits. As an added bonus, Tamara is, in fact, a hot piece of ass. Louie is one lucky guy. (I was dared to write this. It doesn't make it untrue, though).

On Sunday, with about four hours sleep, I went on a four-mile hike with the Hoboken Ski Club and ended up sleeping in the car (which I fortunately wasn't driving) there and back. It was a pleasant day with pleasant conversation of a group that was 90% male. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

As a reminder, the Upright Citizen's Brigade performs for free in Central Park this Thursday. I intend to be there and hope some of you can join me.

Happy Belated Birthday to Michael Malice, whom I understand reads this blog.

Caren reposts a passage about "nice guys" (the entirety of which can be viewed here). I read the original post and some of the comments, as well as Caren's take, and here's what I think:

The use of the term "nice guy" in the original analysis is something of a misnomer. "Nice guy" and "insecure guy" are not necessarily synonymous. I know many legitimately "nice guys" who were not presumptuous or insecure and treated women correctly. They were snapped up by women during high school or college and remain happily married to this day. This leaves a choice of fewer "nice guys" available. The good crops are usually the ones that are picked first.

I agree with most of the analysis (although perhaps the "beg to blow me" line was biologically impossible, but hey it's her blog). Guys who feel the need to toot their own horn about their behavior are not nice. They're manipulative and insecure. Good behavior should be its own reward and women who are drawn to "bad boys" tend to learn the price of such attraction (hopefully before anything truly tragic happens).

In all my time of bitching about women and dating (and ain't saying that just a big turn-on?), I never claimed I was "nice". In fact, usually I'm usually the first to point out my own flaws ("angry man-child" and such) and listen to outside opinion. My riff tends to point out the double-standards and hypocrisy of the dating dynamic. Wouldn't it be nice if we lived in a world when women would feel comfortable asking men out? If that happened, some insecure women who can't approach certain men would complain that these men never notice the nice girls. Wait a second. Doesn't that happen already?

In response to the suggestions, and a few other topics:

I have a many rules for myself with regards to dating, and one of them is this: I don't ask twice. If she says 'no' the first time, I assume it's a permanent decision. To ask twice (or more) smacks of desperation, and I'd rather be single than desperate. If she wants to go out with me later, then she'll have to ask me.

Another rule I have learned relates to online dating. I've had one or two scenarios in which a woman I've been in contact doesn't respond to an e-mail, then out of the blue contacts me again. Usually, the woman asks "why didn't we meet each other months ago?". I'm tempted to reply "because you didn't answer my last e-mail", but I've learned that this is the wrong answer. The correct answer is "I don't know".

For Becky: With regards to planning a first date, I usually only plan minimally and let the date go where the meeting takes us. A standard first date in which further dates are not to be expected lasts about an hour. Good dates with more optimistic possibilities last longer. If there is a second date, I plan more for that one.

For Joel: Why don't I feel I fit in to any group or clique? I'm not sure. I have theories. I recall my 10 year high school reunion in which the nerds were hanging out together (and you'd think that's who I'd "click" with) and while I tried to make conversation, I really had nothing to say to them. I felt like an outsider who happened to attend the same high school. I haven't really kept in touch with anybody from high school except Pam (who was in a very similar situation as me). Perhaps it's how I present myself. Perhaps it's a vibe I give off. Perhaps it's how I perceive and think about subjects. I don't know. Uniqueness is lonely.

SUGGESTION BOX:

Due to limited time to blog this evening, today's post will involve suggestions from the audience. What would you like to read about on this blog? Please leave suggestions in the comments. Thank you.

Upcoming Events:

Saturday the 16th: Long Island International Film Festival will be showing Tamara's movie at 11:45 P.M. I intend to drive across Manhattan to Long Island at approximately 8 P.M. to meet with Tamara at 9 and hang out at a bar beforehand. If anybody wants to skip taking the LIRR to get there, I would be happy to provide a ride (I would probably pick all New Yorkers up at the Port Authority). Send me an e-mail to let me know. Unless I receive an e-mail beforehand, you ain't gettin' a ride.

Wednesday the 13th: (I'm going out of order. Sue me.) The Big Quiz Thing at the JCC in Manhattan. It starts at 8 P.M. A few of the blogger/Trivia crew including myself are going. All are welcome to join us. It's $15 to get in, but the prizes are better than the usual Tuesday night stuff (they include theater tickets and massages).

Thursday the 21st: Upright Citizens Brigade gives a free performance live in Central Park. More on that next week.

I will now get back to my side job of running a white slave trade. Ta-ta.

On Friday night, a date was planned that got cancelled by the woman in question, so I went to the MOMA on the way home from work (it's free on Fridays from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m.). I hate going alone, but fate gave me no choice. I liked the new setup. The floor with the modern designs of household items (such as an iBook and many chairs) was interesting. I enjoyed seeing the Picassos, Dalis, and Magrittes. I've always liked Dali's "The Persistence of Memory" which shows the flaccid clocks, as memory does make time elastic. Magritte's famous work "The Kiss" was there which shows a couple kissing with bags over their hands, demonstrating the belief that love is blind (and perhaps a plea for racial tolerance). There was also a display of some Lee Friedlander photography, and one photo which caught my eye was a 1950's Texas photo of a door saying WHITES ONLY as photographed from the inside to make the letters look backward, showing the backward sort of thinking that the words imply.

On Saturday, I did some reading, did some writing (my novel is now up to 20,000 words), and met up with Chris. We ate at dinner at Funayama, where the waitress with braces kept giving Chris distant stares as if remembering him from a dream she once had. Afterward, we saw the movie "The Fantastic Four".

A quick review: a fun movie. Not a good movie, nor a deep movie (unlike Spider-Man and Batman Begins, which tried to add some depth to the characters) but a fun movie. It seemed inconsistent and the direction was lacking, but the characters of the Thing (Michael Chiklis was the best actor in the movie) and the Human Torch were fairly spot-on to their comic book equivalent. I didn't like the changes to the character of Doctor Doom from the comics. It was also tough to think of Jessica Alba as a scientist who always wears low-cut tops (it's difficult for me to take those underwear model female scientists seriously as scientists). It was fundamentally a live-action superhero cartoon, and should be treated as such.

Today, I have to study for an exam that will be given on Tuesday, so my blog time is limited today. I hope everyone had a nice weekend.

Another night in...

The handyman showed up tonight. I got a price on the putting up the shelves, and putting them up will cost more than the shelves themselves. Evidentally, the walls must be cut away and wooden blocks must be placed within the wall for stability. The wall must then have a replacement layer of sheetrock put on. Yikes.

As you all know by now, the public transportation system in London was bombed by terrorists. I lived in England for a year, and when I heard the news I e-mailed several Londoners I knew to verify that they were okay.

It got me thinking about perceptions of "the enemy" in this day and age. It used to be that "the enemy" was associated with certain countries. In the 1940's, the enemy was the Axis powers, which were the countries of Japan, Germany, and Italy. Afterwards, the enemy became the Communists, which were mostly Russia and China. Enemies are useful. Fear of enemies gets leaders elected and laws passed.

Today, the enemy is terrorists. The interesting thing about this enemy is that, even though they most originate from a corruption of Middle-Eastern philosophy, we have no particular country to affiliate with them. They could just as easily be from Northern Ireland or Oklahoma. Anybody can be a terrorist. Distrust your neighbor. He/she could be a terrorist or conspirator in hiding. The currently administration thrives on this atmos-fear.

You know who else the current administration opposes? Gays. Not a particular race or gender, because they're mostly easy to spot. However, anybody can be gay and a person wouldn't know it at first glance.

I make light, but the truth is that if we take the philosophies of the political parties at their core, "conservative" means "favoring traditional views", whereas "liberal" means "open to new ideas". Most of the time, it's the liberals that change the world.

I'm convinced that conservatives need enemies to blame in order to thrive, and the enemies are more useful if it was possible for anyone to be one. If they didn't have an enemy, they'd invent one. And their most useful indistinguishable enemy nowadays is the liberal.

I'm sure the ultimate enemy of the conservative party would be the gay liberal terrorist.

Thus endeth my political rant.

UPDATE: London has been subject to a terrorist attack. I have several friends in England from the year I spent there and I hope they're alright.

Definition of annoying: cancelling one's original plans for Wednesday evening to meet with a contractor that doesn't keep the appointment or call to explain why.

Doctor Who 2005 : The Season in Review

SPOILERS FOLLOW. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE SPOILED ROTTEN, STOP READING.

Here's the biggest spoiler: at the season's end, the main character, The Doctor, dies.

This is the beauty of the series "Doctor Who" and the reason it lasted 26 years in England before cancellation. When the main character dies, he can regenerate his body into a new person with a new personality. This way, it's possible to continue the series with a different actor in the lead role. The BBC rumor was that Christopher Eccleston didn't want to get typecast, but I don't buy it. I think it's more likely that the new series' producers wanted the character to die at the end of the first season so people could witness this particular ability of the Doctor and understand the potential (other than vague references, the series is utilizing a "neither confirm nor deny" policy towards the previous series up to its end in 1989).

FYI, the new actor playing the Doctor starting at Christmastime is David Tennant.

The series consisted of 13 45 minute episodes, which makes sense since the previous series consisted of 26 half-hour episodes. However, this "new" British series has learned from it's American sci-fi counterparts and changed the format to the popular 1-hour drama with a season-long story arc. I noted that the series is only 45 minutes, allowing 15 minutes for commercials when it is broadcast on BBC America, eventually.

Damn, this show is FUN. It has all the best elements of the original series (the eccentric, brilliant character of the Doctor. The endless possibilities of his travels) along with good and proper special effects. It shows the potential of the concept of a benevolent protector travelling in time and space moreso than the original series ever could.

I confess to a bit of disappointment at the season's end. I never liked the plotlines where a character becomes a god and undoes all the bad things that happened. It seems like lazy writing to me. However, they did foreshadow it to a degree so it's somewhat forgivable.

I loved the mix of different story styles for the season. There was a Victorian ghost story, a military shoot-up involving an old alien nemesis race of the Doctor called the Daleks, and a poignant story in which his human friend, Rose, uses the time machine available to her to try and prevent her father's accidental death in the 1980's.

I know there are those that read this blog who do not like sci-fi and probably would not like this series since it deals more with moral questions about our role in the universe than with relationships (the relationship between the Doctor and Rose is more father-daughter than romantic), but if you don't mind trying sci-fi with British accents, then I recommend this one.

I could write much more about this show, but I'll stop my review here. I look forward to the next season. It's about time.

I think I'm bipolar.

I've noticed that certain things I see or read or hear just set off my emotions,both positive and negative. Sometimes I just want to scream and rant like a child or laugh like an idiot. I feel I have poor self-control, but I think I'm getting better (certainly better than I used to be). For me, it's a bit of an effort. As a result, I tend to think that my first instinct is a good idea when most of the time it sucks. This is why nowadays when I have an idea of something I want to do that is questionable at best, I wait a minimum of 24 hours before I do it (unless it's an immediate need). If I still think it's a good idea, I try to wait until it goes away. It ain't easy.

I attribute this particular personal characteristic to my comfort on stage or in front of a crowd. That's a positive aspect. I've found it has more drawbacks than advantages, though.

In other news...

It looks like I'm not going to the Jinx Magazine debate tomorrow night. I have to meet with a professional about putting up some shelves.

My weekend is void of things to do. I want to do one or more of the following:

1. Go bowling.
2. See "The Fantastic Four".
3. Take a road trip in my car.

If anybody has an interest, let me know.

On a final note for today, Happy Birthday Bex!

I hope everyone had a nice July 4th weekend. I had a lovely day today. I would talk more about it, but I had to sign a confidentiality agreement.

My favorite fireworks remain the fireworks that explode in a smiley-face formation.

I have finished the entire 13-episode season of Doctor Who and will post a review shortly.

Jinx Magazine is hosting their monthly debate this coming Wednesday. I'm debating on going.

Stop reading this and get back to work!

UPDATE 7/5/2005 4:38 AM: It's time for another session of early-waking insomnia. Whoo-hoo! I've been up since 3:45 AM. I haven't had one of these in a while. I don't even know why I'm having it. I've been rejected by a lot of women recently. Perhaps that has something to do with it. Or maybe it was the Beef Bourguignon I had for dinner.

A pseudo-funny pseudo-dating story:

At Trivia Wednesday night, one of the co-hosts was attractive and had similar tastes as me (as shown in the questions she asked), so I tried speaking with her for a moment between rounds and in the end, I gave her my card with my home e-mail on the back. I generally prefer this (even if women don't), because if they're not interested then all they have to do is not e-mail me.

Then, when I told another woman I knew there, she VEHEMENTLY insisted that I go back to the co-host and get her e-mail and phone. "I'm sorry, but that's how things work", she said. Like a fool, because I didn't want to upset the person in question, I did.

I sent the e-mail to the co-host today. This was my response:

"Hi. I'm sorry but I can't meet up. I know it was well intentioned but I felt awkwardly put on the spot on Wednesday and I can't shake it."

I didn't bother to respond. What could I say? I wonder if this follows the pattern of the woman I briefly dated earlier this year whom I made "anxious"?

Since I felt bad for all of you, since I stopped actively trying to date and therefore don't have stories to share (since, y'know, you all share with me, he says in a sarcastic tone) I decided to purchase some credits on the Nerve.com personals today. I don't expect this to be any more successful than my other recent endeavours, but at least I'll have things to write about. If you're on Nerve.com then watch out! You may get an e-mail from me.

Saturday Night Bloggin':

The exciting part of my weekend is over. This evening, I met with a friend for dinner (dinner itself involved me personally cooking paper-thin pieces of chicken on a heated rock) and a movie (the movie was "Mr. and Mrs. Smith". I enjoyed it despite the hype surrounding it).

Now, the boring part begins. I am doing nothing on Sunday. For those who know me, they know I hate having weekend days with nothing to do. If you're doing something that is interesting and wouldn't mind company, let me know.

Speaking of doing something, the Upright Citizens Brigade (the original members) are performing a free improv comedy show in Central Park on Thursday, July 21st. I'm going. If you want to join me, let me know.

Books that I have just taken out of the NY Public Library:
"The Hippopotamus" by Stephen Fry.
"Nothing's Sacred" by Lewis Black.
"Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim" by David Sedaris
"Wigfield: The Can-Do Town That Just May Not" by Amy Sedaris, Paul Dinello, and Stephen Colbert. Photos by Todd Oldham

I have read the post at the Attention Men blog. I will recreate the post paragraph by paragraph and respond:

"Hallo. Allow us to explain this site and why you, personally, have been directed here."

I was directed here by my own choice. You don't actually know why I was directed here. You just assume.

"You were probably directed here by a ladyfriend, possibly someone you only went on one date with, not necessarily recently. It could even be a friend."

No, actually I found it from a link on another blog.

"There are many things girls have wanted to tell you during dates, but are fearful of ruining the moment or being considered nuts or bitchy. . ."

Then they should say it anyways. Women are so neurotic. Sheesh.

"You may recently, or in the past, or in the near future, have tried to get a woman you are dating to have sex. (probably the main reason you were sent to us.) Thats no surprise. Women and men like sex. However, when girls try to wait a little, so that we get to know you better, we are often misunderstood. You should learn that when we let you into our bodies, it's often emotional even if we don't say it and we hope it will become part of a relationship. Finding someone we trust and love and want to have sex with is hard, but once we do, we want to have sex with you again and again"

Baloney. I know women who have had sex on the first date. Men are just less neurotic about it. You're making a plethora of assumptions that you can't back up.

"but there has been a recent spate of situations where women are misinterpreted as uninterested, frigid, or prudish if they act standoffish on initial dates when you try to encourage sex Is it horrible to know someone for at least just a few weeks first? If we act unemotional or standoffish, it is not because we don't want to do you, and its also not because we're cold or have intimacy issues, or because we've been hurt. No matter what we say, many times, we need a little evidence that you won't "disappear" on us afteward, and no, your word or all the nice things you said to us on a first date are not good enough. Won't you want to know us a little better (at least, more than a few weeks) before being naked inside of us?"

Really? A spate? If some guy tries to have sex with you, fails, and never calls you again, then he's unworthy of your time and attention.

"Plus, the sex will be much better if we like you and trust you. Letting you into our body is better and easier if we're really excited about it. (we need to open up and get excited for you. think about it. Hey hope that didnt turn you on)"

Not really. If you want to turn me on, show up at my front door, naked.

"acting as if you're interested in someone for a relationship, having sex, and then never seeing them again IS hurtful. It's not that you always intend to be hurtful and I know that sometimes boys really feel into someone until they have died on the vine."

What the hell does this mean? You're judging all men by the actions of a few. How old are you? 16?

"That's another reason we want to get to know you better first. Are you going to stick around? Only a few dates will tell (or make us feel less used, at least)"

I have stuck around, when I was attracted to the girl. Mostly, I got dumped. Sounds like you're trying to have guys pick you up in bars hoping to get a meaningful relationship out of it, in which case you're in the wrong place.

"You may be spoiled from other girls. Sometimes it takes work to get to know someone. You're not always going to lie back and be serviced. Not until after the movies, anyway."

I wish it only took a trip to the movies!

"HAVE PATIENCE. Instead of 'can I stay', it can be 'I've wanted to do that for a long time.'"

Okay. I agree with this one.

"We wrote this together on behalf of those girls who are tired of this rollercoaster...going on dates, having almost-relationships fail, then trying to behave as if you never were hurt, while at the same time protect ourselves."

I hate to burst your bubble, but it happens to men too. We're trying not to ridiculously overspend on a woman who has no intention of remaining beyond the free meal.

"The solution is to wait for just a few dates...is that so bad? Fellows, if you're single, that means you haven't been getting so much sex sometimes either. So be calm about it."

Only a few dates? Hell, I'd happily wait if it was just a few dates. Can we have a definitive timeframe here?

"More posts to come at other dates. (And girls, feel free to share your own things below that you want to tell men without seeming like a bitch or "nuts." That's why this is here.)"

And I look forward to reading future posts for analysis. Have a nice day!